Relationships

June 9, 2020

Tips for Performing Acts of Kindness

Many of you have read about and heard Amanda Salzhauer (co-author of The Kindness Advantage) and me discuss The Helper’s High, a term coined by Alan Lux). The Helper’s High refers to a flood of endorphins that occurs in a person doing a kind act that makes them feel good and encourages them to do another […]
June 9, 2020

Conversation Hugs

Because of COVID-19, many of the critical ways we connect with others – person to person conversations, physical touch, hugs – have become impossible. Millions of people have turned to frequent phone calls, Zoom, and other internet platforms seeking to find ways to replace the missing connection. Often these efforts […]
February 4, 2020

Tips for Attending to Someone’s Grief

For most of my professional career I have tried to help people come to terms with loss.  The loss of the child they had hoped for and the adaptation to the one they had; the loss of a job that they wanted or had; the loss of a relationship, the […]
February 4, 2020

Lessons on How to Live

As some of you are aware, my beloved mother, Sylvia Atkins, died one month ago.  A role model to almost everyone who met her, she was loving, inspirational, and lived with an indescribable vibrancy and energy.  She had a deep appreciation of life and was curious about everyone she met. […]
December 30, 2019

Tips for the Gift of Listening

Many of us think our role in a conversation is to talk. In fact, what most people seem to prefer is to have a conversation partner who is a good listener.  We may say too much, repeat ourselves to make a point (when the point is already made), talk about […]
December 2, 2019

Sharing Confidential Information

We all agree that we expect confidentiality when we share information with healthcare, law, or professionals. There are rigorous ethical standards that guide these relationships and we all expect compliance.   Lately, I have been thinking about whether we have similar expectations in our non-professional relationships. When we share personal […]
November 4, 2019

Be and Ally and Speak Up for What is Right

Amanda and I wrote The Kindness Advantage, in part to help families positively address the increase in disrespectful and bullying behavior. Bullying can be physical or emotional and can occur at any stage of our life.   Too many of us choose to do nothing when they see or hear […]
August 28, 2019

Tips for Managing our Own Expectations with Others

I am hearing more and more from people who express disappointment with their family or friends. They wonder why their family and friends do not do the things they “should” do (what the person wants and expects). “He should have known how I was feeling”. “She should have called; she […]
August 28, 2019

The Benefits of Seeing our Similarities Through our Differences

When I was in college, I found it incredibly relaxing to sit at LaGuardia Airport and watch people coming and going. No kidding. Always the observer, it was a great delight for me. (This was before security prevented anyone who didn’t have a ticket from hanging out at an airport.)  […]
July 30, 2019

Tips for Times when Someone Tells Us Difficult News

It happens in life. Someone we know will be fired, go through a divorce, be informed of an illness, receive an indictment, be involved in an accident, or lose someone they love.  When this happens likely, they will want to not only tell us but want to talk about it. […]